Tuesday, December 16, 2008

Up Yer Kilts!

For my real life hubby and my cyberguy, both of whom look awesome in kilts:

Guys' Top 15 Reasons to own a Kilt:>

1. Chicks I've never met before ask me about my underwear.
2. Kilt + Bathroom = Easy.
3. The freedom to scratch when and where it itches.
4. It itches a lot less in a kilt- it's the breeze
5. It makes people wonder.
6. You can call Punks conformists.
7. Almost as good as being naked.
8. Women love men in kilts.
9. When operating a zipper is too far beyond your capabilities.
10. Floor mounted AC vents on a hot day.
11. History has shown that men in kilts routinely kick the shit out of the trousered.
12. In the words of Mel Gibson in Braveheart ..."Freedom!"
13. Two Words. Beer Pockets.
14. Asshole Auto-Detect System: Anyone who snickers and says "nice skirt" is obviously a homophobe or just plain stodgy...
15. It's called a "kilt" 'cause we done kilt everyone who called it a skirt.

Reasons Why Women Love Men Who Wear Kilts:

1. Access
2. Air circulation = Virility
3. The way his pleats swing when he walks
4. It would be a shame to hide legs like that.
5. It takes confidence to wear a kilt, and confidence is sexy
6. I don't have to bother asking, "Boxers or briefs?"
7. When I'm with my man, the look of envy I get from others
8. Sitting across from him on the Subway.
9. Zero to naked in 2 seconds
10. Sean Connery, Mel Gibson... need I go on?

4 comments:

Larry said...

For some reason, every time I wear my kilt it seems to get to the point where the first #9 applies, and never to the point where the second #9 does. Damn.

Callie said...

I think kilts are sexy!

Larry said...

C..C...C...Callie? Is that really you??? Phew, thank Biff, you're alive.

Penny said...

OMG she's ALIVE! She's alive! Callie, sunshine!!!!! *hugs!!!*

Now, if we could only hear something from Motherdear, Kal and, oh I don't know, my HUSBAND..it'd just feel like old times.